![]() |
Once upon a time when people met in-person, a chit chat discussion topic was: "Which person would you bring back from the dead to talk to?" I would sit patiently with my intellectual shotgun ready to unload on the first person who cited someone like George Washington, the first president of the United States of America.
To scoff at the question, I would first predict that President Washington would die from a heart attack from the shock of being brought back from the dead centuries later. But let's say he survived the shock and met me for coffee. He might ask the first white man he saw, "Who owns this mulatto? Who taught him how to read and write?"
Let's say you are the next person who gets to talk with him. I would flip the script. What makes you think George Washington would want to talk with you? You might want to talk with him, but that doesn't mean the reverse is true. He might have his own wish list of things to do or people that he might want to meet. He first might want to catch up on what has been happening the last 222 years since he died, especially in those couple of years after he died in 1799. Instead of talking to a history professor, he might want to get into the bringing-people-back-from-the-dead game. "I feared Alexander Hamilton would screw things up and get shot. Could I bring him back from the dead?"
To the persistent ones who insist that President Washington might want to talk with them, I ask: If you think George Washington might want to talk with you, then tell me: how many leading figures today are seeking your counsel? If the answer is "none," that might match the number of historical figures returned from the dead who might seek you out or want to talk to you longer than thanking you for bringing them back to life.
There are other people I like to flip the script on. Among my favorite targets: gift-givers. Now you may be wondering, "Lartigue, how could anyone criticize a gift giver?" In most cases that I have seen, people speaking the language of love through gift-giving don't really seem to be thinking about the recipients. They want to give gifts, whether or not if you want them. It isn't surprising that so much money gets wasted every year in unwanted gifts.
When it comes to gift-giving, it is said that it is the thought that counts, and I make that point when a gift-giver later asks me what I did with the gift. "I re-gifted it to a gift-giver I know. You wouldn't believe how much trouble I had getting someone to keep it." If they complain about me re-gifting it, I will remind them: "It is the thought that counts. I thought that other person might want the gift" Or out of the blue, I will say, "I am saving it to give to George Washington in case I can finally bring him back from the dead. I have a whole closet of gifts waiting for him."
I also like to flip the script on experts who talk about what they would say to the North Korean dictator if they had a chance to talk to him. Back in 2012, I was asked in a radio interview what I would say to the then-new dictator Kim Jong-un, my response was: "Nothing." Why would Kim Jong-un waste time talking with me when he might be choosing which "Pleasure Squad" girl he would rape today or drinking the latest foreign wine brought to him?
Some people will insist, saying they might be able to say something that could get Kim Jong-un to change his murderous ways. So I flip that script on them too: What could Kim Jong-un say that could possibly convince you get to start supporting his reign of terror? When people talk about changing someone else's mind, they don't flip the script to consider that the reverse could be true: the other person wants to change your mind.
As you can guess, flipping the script on people makes them uncomfortable. The good news is that the gift-givers tell me they are going to take my name off their Christmas lists. But that's okay. To thank me for bringing him back from the dead, George Washington may bring me some gifts to deliver to Kim Jong-un.
Casey Lartigue, Jr., (CJL@alumni.harvard.edu) is editor of "Voices from the North" and co-founder along with Eunkoo Lee of Freedom Speakers International (FSI).