Dear Dr.P,

Hello, I am in the process of applying for a visa to work in Korea. I have a question about the required Health Statement. One of the questions asks if I have ever received treatment for an emotional or nervous disorder.

I see a psychiatrist and am currently prescribed Lexapro. I’m scared that if I write this down in my statement, my visa application will be rejected.

Should I be truthful, or should I omit this information? I do have anxiety, but I function well in everyday life. Also, do you know of a psychiatrist that would be able to prescribe this medication in Changwon?

DEAR ANONYMOUS,

I can understand what you must be going through in terms of visa application worries. I don’t think it is necessary for you to disclose all of your personal details in depth.

Recently the Korean people are well informed that depression is a common cold of mind that can be cured by the professional therapy. Nevertheless, there is still some prejudice against people who are in psychiatric treatment in Korea. Going into this level of detail should not be a legal issue.

Changwon is a fairly large city so it should be easy to find psychiatrist there who can prescribe the medication you need.

However, it may be a bit more difficult to find an English speaking doctor there. If you need help once arriving in Korea, please feel free to contact me and I can try to help refer you to a place/person.

Dear Dr. P,

I am a Czech girl married to a Korean. We live in the U.S. near my husband’s family. Although my husband’s parents first opposed our marriage, I was later lovingly accepted.

I had difficulty adjusting to Korean culture. The most difficult relationship was with my mother-in-law. She is a loving person whom I admire and she gives us advice.

Often, I disagree with her openly. I can’t let my own culture disappear, and must be true to myself. This really upsets her but I don’t want to feel overpowered by her.

My husband tells me that she won’t change, and that my attempts to make her understand me are wasteful. How can I handle this situation so that our relationship remains positive? (Kata)

DEAR KATA,

I can understand the hardship you are going through. Many Korean women have a difficult time with their mothers-in-law.

One reason the problem is so prevalent, and worsens with time, is because many parents-in-law want their sons and daughters-in-law to live with them.

Above all, your mother-in-law treating you like her biological daughter, which may be a strong source of stress for you. Trying to change your mother-in-law’s attitude will make her very upset, disappointed, and potentially cause additional problems.

Therefore, I advise that you try to accept and appreciate your mother-in-law’s affection. Focus on the good things that she is doing for you; for example the help that she gives you.

Usually, it is very hard to change a mother-in-law’s behavior, and these attempts could bring about adverse effects.

It would be helpful for you to try your best to understand her behavior; but if it gets unbearable, then you should ask her politely to stop.

Park Jin-seng is a psychiatrist who runs a clinic for foreigners in Seoul and operates the personal therapist forums on www.lifeinkorea.com. Please submit questions for Park to mdoctor@korea.com or call the hotline at 1588-4276.