DEAR ABBY: My husband served in Vietnam and proudly wears a Vietnam veteran insignia on his jacket or cap everywhere he goes. People approach him all the time and thank him for his service, which is wonderful. The big question is, how should he respond? He isn't quite sure what to say back to them -- "You're welcome"? "It was my honor to serve"? "Thank you for caring"? I'm not sure of the right response, either. So I told my husband I'd ask you. What's the proper thing to say when someone is kind enough to take a minute and say thanks? -- VET'S WIFE IN PHOENIX DEAR VET'S WIFE: I'm sure being thanked for his service in Vietnam is music to your husband's ears. When members of the military returned from Vietnam, many of them were treated with hostility. A proper response when someone thanks him for his service would be any of those you offered, or a simple, "Thanks for saying that. I appreciate it." ** ** ** ** ** DEAR ABBY: My grandson and his bride were going through their gift envelopes and found some with nothing in them. They don't know if there was money inside and it fell out. If they thank a guest for a gift and there was none, it could seem sarcastic. If they don't thank the person and there was money inside and it got lost -- THEN what? What do they say? Also, there was a family (mother, son and daughter-in-law) who attended the wedding. The mother put in a check that was larger than she really could afford, while the son and daughter-in-law left a card with nothing inside. We don't know what to do, because my grandson doesn't know if the check was intended to be from the three of them. Abby, what's the proper way to handle this? -- EMPTY ENVELOPES IN CALIFORNIA DEAR EMPTY ENVELOPES: Your grandson and his bride should write notes to those guests whose envelopes were empty saying, "We want to thank you for being part of our wedding day and helping to make it so memorable and meaningful. Your presence and the fact that you were with us made it extra special. With love ..."
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